Thursday, July 28, 2011

Top 5 reasons why I should be a frontier woman


1 by unphotographable
I have these boots to wear.
1, a photo by unphotographable on Flickr.

1. I make this face I call my “Strong frontier woman face,” achieved by flexing my jaw and flaring my nostrils a little bit and stretching my neck pretty long. I cannot overemphasize the importance of having a solid “frontier woman” face. When your house is ablaze or your husband’s head is hoofed in by a horse, etc., your family and community will look to you for reassurance.  When they see your nostrils flare ever-so-slightly, your eyes steely and determined, they’ll be like “Cool. Everything will be OK. Let’s start pulling these arrows out of our legs.”

2. I am becoming more adept at putting my hair in braids and pinning them to my head. The better to see my high cheekbones when I flex them.

3. I own some bandanas.

4. I read the Lonesome Dove tetraology and Blood Meridian, so I pretty much know what to expect: I will have to cut my horse’s throat at some point and probably drink the pee from its bladder.

5. I get along well with animals.

A bad reason is I vomit when I get too hot. So, we’ll see. 

1 comment: